Do you have to open your mouth every chance that you get, so you can pontificate to anyone that will listen to you?

Please, shut the mouth and remove your foot, people don’t want to hear you march on with your mouth. They would like you to listen to them, and then (hang on) don’t say anything.

I thought Lincoln said this, but according to a book I have Mark Twain said it: “It is better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.”

Whether it was Lincoln or Twain it is good statement and I wish I could take credit for it. People have to talk and give their opinions to other people who really don’t care. Take your boss. I know this is hard for some of the more outspoken and stupid people to believe this, but your boss does not want to hear from you every time he makes a decision. The boss makes a decision for better or worse, and after the decision has been made, it has been made. Either work with it, or go find a job somewhere else- it will probably be a better job anyway. And many times when the boss makes a decision he could lose his or her job by making it, so he or she would like some cooperation, please.

How about your significant other- they don’t want to hear it either, unless you’re in your “cups,” “three sheets to the wind” so to speak, and then who cares.

How about someone that is directing you to help you be better (a teacher, a philosopher, a friend or someone else that could help you)? If they make a mistake, do you have to correct them all of the time? Just go with it and move on with life. My goodness, why all of the hubbub? Save it for something really important, like when you might be really right, and then you can really lower the boom and make sure you will never have a friend, someone to help you, or someone that will make sure to prove you wrong next time and say, “I told you so.”

Keep it shut- and do something unusual- think about what you are going to say and then don’t say it, since it probably won’t make any difference anyway and you will appear understanding, someone that could be leaned on, and relativity smart. Maybe even someone that could be counted on in the future, someone that deserves a raise and a promotion. So zip it, you aren’t the smartest, brightest or thinnest person on the planet anyway- that’s what Ma Jones reminded me growing up when I got too full of it myself.

L. Dennis Kozlowski and Mark Swartz got up to 25 years each in prison, and are ordered to pay nearly 240 million dollars in court this year. Is that enough? Or in a few years will they have their own reality show like Martha Stewart?

Let us review:

Samuel Waksal, founder of ImClone Systems Inc., was fined $4.3 million and sentenced to 7 years, and is in federal prison.

Jamie Olis, former vice president of Dynegy Inc., is sentenced to 24 years for financial fraud.

Martha Stewart, please.

Frank Quattrone, investment banker, 18 months, free on appeal.

John and Timothy Rigas, Adelphia, 15 and 20 years respectively, free on bail. If my wife had her way, life with no parole, and a spanking- you know mothers.

Bernard Ebbers, WorldCom, 25 years free on appeal. My wife bought stock in that one, instead of just TV service, so I’d hate to see what she would do with him.

And the list goes on. Why would people who had everything, and could have everything, have such a lack of values?

I read a recent poll (finally not about the California’s special election- my wife is voting yes on all of them, if you think he is the Terminator) that said most employees would judge an executive or boss on the basis of honesty.

Is it really just greed? An arrogance that “I can get away from everything and everyone, I am king”- and we all know it is good to be king. (See Mel Brooks)

How do these people live with themselves? I guess very comfortably. Except when they have to part with cash, and get a new room complete with roommate.

Be careful Mr. Oil Executive, remember no lavish parties on videotape, keep it on the low down.

I am a capitalist, and think it is a great system with a lot of freedom. Maybe everyone ought to slow down and look at values, character and goals that all of the stakeholders can see. Perhaps they need some coaching before they make bad mistakes. Do you think Martha is going to be calling? I guess not. But the Board of Directors should have my hotline.

One of the things we emphasize here at Life Motivations is the difference between self-help and the need for professional psychological assistance. The Maple Counseling Center in Beverly Hills, California provides low-coast services to people in the region, as well as crisis response assistance to people across the country in situations like the recent hurricanes. Their annual fundraiser, the Crystal Ball, takes place next week.

How about not quitting? I know that at some point there may be no point, but what would happen if people around the world just started quitting? What would happen? One of the Success Characteristics that I speak about is determination, as in the determination to follow through. You know the old story that Thomas Edison worked on the light bulb 10,000 times. Who knows the exact number, but we know that he was busy for many years working on many things. And if Edison quit on the first try, where would we be today? Where would any of us be if we quit on the first try? You need the determination to keep going forward, to move ahead without the lack of courage that we may sometimes feel in ourselves. Want to quit? Cut it out and keep going- you can do it, you know.

PS: Check out the recent Weekly Challenges as an introduction or to find a new success technique.

“There is never a traffic jam on the extra mile.”

Here is a phrase we all should lose from our vocabulary, but I hear it all the time, don’t you? “To be honest with you, I have never done a deal like this before.” “To be honest with you here is a little secret that is not well known.” “To be honest with you” implies that you have been dishonest all the time before that you have been talking to them. It gives people the impression that you are the slick, white shoe, pinky ring kind of person. That is fine if that is what you want to portray, but you will lose sales and not even know why. I know more than one chief executive that uses the phrase, “To be honest with you.” It is a horrible habit and you might not even know that you are saying it. We get so comfortable with our language we don’t check to see if it is updated or not. You need to slow down and listen to yourself, in addition to the customer. Hear what you are saying, and if one of these things is “To be honest with you” then do yourself a favor and lose this phrase or any other that might just be nervous habits you have gathered over the years. Instead, be proactive in your sales language. After all, one of the most important things in your sales career is your language.

PS: See the recent Sales Tips of the Week from Step Jones

This famous and very successful actress was Dianne Delmont as a model; she became a very successful female comedian, what is her name?

1. Gilda Radner
2. Goldie Hawn
3. Joan Rivers
4. Lucille Ball
5. Phyllis Diller

Answer the question correctly and get a free MP3 download of Step Jones’s CD Help Yourself Be Better  from his upcoming new audio product Jump Start

The answer to last week’s trivia question is #3, Oprah Winfrey.