Linda Martinez was 29 when she took her own life. Linda graduated from USC, and had a fabulous career going on. She was a musician that was actually getting work- and a lot of it.

Linda was a performer for “The Keenen Ivory Wayans Show,” which lead to other appearances touring with Destiny’s Child, and recently at the Disney Concert Hall with Sheila E. and Alex Acuna.

She was a composer that actually had worked in TV with Turner Classic Movies, and had written music for several films.

Many of her friends described Linda as “sparkly in her personality and sparkly musically.”

Her friends think it is so shocking that she could have ended her own life, because the person that they knew couldn’t have taken her own life.

But with many suicides, the people closest don’t have a clue. If the people around them knew, they surely would have done something.

I don’t know if we will ever know why she took her life, but I hope that we learn from Linda to prevent this from happening in the future.

It seems that this tale is all too common- that people don’t understand how something like this could have happened.

John Kevin Hines from the very moment that he jumped off the Golden Gate Bridge knew he had made a mistake. As soon as he jumped he tried to scream, but the rush of air sucked the air from his lungs. He righted himself to crash into the ocean feet first. Fracturing an ankle and shattering two vertebrae in his lower back, he plunged 40 feet down into the water and found a way to the surface in 50-degree water. Hines was 19 when a boat found him and pulled him out of the water.

John was lucky he lived; of the more than 1300 that have jumped off the bridge only 16 have survived.

No one knew that John was thinking about killing himself.

If you need professional help get it, but what about most of us who have a blue note in life? We feel we may not be adequate, or good enough, or popular enough, or whatever enough. Where can we get that love, that contact, that feeling of living a goal-orientated life that will make a difference for us?

Why do we feel the way we feel and no one knows?

And we think no one cares, because we are afraid to share our feelings.

Success Philosophy shares with us that we are good, that we are just human, that we do make mistakes, but we are not a mistake. We do have choices, and we can have success in all areas of our lives. We are winners.

But unless we talk about it, no one knows. And we think no one cares, and we don’t realize that we can always do something with our lives that will benefit not only ourselves, but also others. Life is an adventure, and you are never too old, or not smart enough, or too late to make the changes you want in your life. Realize that we all have those feelings of self-doubt. None of us are immune, so you are not alone in those feelings. Have love and energy for your plan of life and know that you are not perfect - no one is - but you can choose to work toward a better future.

My son asked me what I do for a living yesterday, and I told him I try to help other people be better at what they are doing, and so I talk to people. He said, “Daddy can I do that? I want to be in your business.”

Ok, it is not all I do, but it is probably the most important thing I do. And I don’t want to do it all the time, even though people expect me to.

Sometimes I would just like to lie down and take a little nap- you know what I mean.

So I ducked out quickly from the radio show yesterday, got home and took a little nap. And then spent some time with my son.

I am teaching him how to be a leader by learning to be kind, telling the truth and helping others become better at what they do- knowing that none of us are perfect, or God-like, but just human beings that have relationships with other human beings. And as leaders, leading by caring and by example, rather than finding the position that allows someone the lever of power that they pull to see what they can make someone do.

It is easy to armchair quarterback, but we must move past the mistakes and go forward with how can we do something that will make us all stronger.

I remember my father saying that if it doesn’t kill you, it makes you stronger.

I am not sure I want to go that far. Rather, I ask how can I help someone be better? Sometimes it just takes some encouragement, or saying thank you, or putting your heads together to create the next level that you want to go to.

So now my son is tired of all of this talk and he no longer wants to be like daddy, but a rock ’n roll star.

Well, so much for my effectiveness in communicating leadership with my son. How are you doing?

You are what you think. You can be depressed, you can be a rock ’n roll star. How you become either one is by thinking that it is your now, your present state: “I am depressed”, or “I am a rock star.” What if you changed your thinking? For example, instead of thinking that you want to be a rock ’n roll star, you think that you are depressed.

Or let’s start much easier: how do you want tonight to go? Do you want to sit in front of the TV and watch shows that you might have seen before? Hey, sometimes I do, and there is nothing wrong with that if you plan it, instead of just doing it.

Why not plan the weekend? What would the perfect Saturday and Sunday look like to you?

Try planning, or visualizing, what you would like to do today, tomorrow, and this weekend. If you get good at that, can you do what you would like next month, and next year?

This may seem silly, but why not write down what you want to do tonight, tomorrow night and the rest of the week and see how it turns out.

Then go for the gold! What would you like to do next month, the month after that, the next year, and further? Ah, an interesting exercise- see what happens to you.

PS: Check out the recent Weekly Challenges as an introduction or to find a new success technique.